lacus_86 @ 2010-11-25T17: 37:00
Just this morning, I have stopped to watch, playing with soap bubbles. It 'a long time since I saw them, I think I was a child, I brought to mind happy memories, fairs, she was beautiful and fun to go there when there was the pleasure, child, to look at all the toys on the stands and ask mom and dad "I bought the soap bubbles?". And the wonder of blowing in the middle of the soap and see the magic of many bubbles, shiny, reflecting the colors of the party, the carefree happiness of times where your only thought is to play, and play, and play ... then come down and it all ends, burst with a twitch, but the magic still continues, and just blow you dive back into that world of wonder and amazement that gives you the feeling of living a beautiful dream.
Then you wake up, grow up, you are an adult, you have responsibilities, commitments, claiming the life you and puts you in the face of evidence after another, everything becomes monotonous, life gives you more than that dream, magic vanishes. Until one day you discover that the magic is still there, those bubbles are always the same, they live a few seconds, but they give you another dream, that feeling of awe and wonder he wakes up and makes you see with new eyes enchanted the world, including when is black, even when that feeling of feeling like a total failure invades you, shakes you, makes you tremble violently, wanting it to end as soon as possible, not be more wrong and you close again, in your shell of selfishness, want to protect yourself, you want everything to end, but at the same time to wake up like it was a bad dream, and then you wake up and realize that it is not a bad dream ;. I often wonder how far we can push the desire to save something, even if you know it'll be at the expense of something else. I do not know, I do not know where we can get, yet at the same time attempting to show aware that the price may be high, but if it is for someone you really love, then 're willing to run, although sooner or later has the same account, tumble after tumble. A saying goes "It hurts more than the language of the sword", is true, but at the same time the silence hurts, but sometimes it's the only way you can express something, eloquent than words . Words can hurt, can hurt, they can destroy, are equivocal, create misunderstandings, the obvious silence, the silence helps you to reflect, to think, to protect against situations that can hurt. The gestures injured, one hand can caress and may slapped, turn your back can make you understand that you have committed a wrong, yet they often do so without realizing it. It makes me smile to think that a few years ago, determined to make it clear to a guy that I liked my feelings, I wrote a dedication on a book to borrow, foolishly, unable to directly address the situation for fear of rejection. Robyn looked at me, advised me to cancel that sentence, and I did not, because they are obstinate and stubborn, and that was the only way that I had to let you know how I felt at that guy. It 'stupid now, that was the most convenient way, the less work that I would suffer less if he had refused ... Roby I turned away, ignored me, I spoke for two days, the silence made me feel bad, I did not understand why he continued to do so. Then I said "I have physically turned his back so you could understand why you were wrong, but never mind because whenever you're my best friend "... Moral of the story: the boy was heard, but just wanted to have fun and disappeared like a soap bubble, but that gesture made me realize that I was wrong and wanted to warn me to avoid disappointment. Also quarreled, but then everything was resolved. I also broke this, thinking that being silent, I would understand a former friend that his attitude and his way of being were wrong, and sooner or later they would be alone. I tried and tried to talk to me, but I was determined at that time, I felt that this was the proper way to make him understand. Breaking, since we do not speak anymore. Whether right or wrong, potentially everything can hurt, it's up to us whether or not it is worth taking a risk of confrontation taken to the extreme. I go back to the magic of soap bubbles, at this moment, to immerse myself in that magical world helps me not think about the evil I have done and the fight that I have undertaken, but the bubbles have a short life .. and when everything is over you go back to thinking, pounding, that at any time comeback to bite and make you feel bad ... and the desire to go back becomes stronger, but it is not possible. I wish I had more courage, more strength of mind, but at the moment, the only thing that remains in the hand is shaking while I write, and in a great void.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
What To Write In A Wedding Card For Boss
Moment of sclero ... write!
Mh .. I woke up from afternoon nap after dreaming of writing on lj, so I said "sooner or later" I do .. and here I am! Also because what happens? From the series "This is what has not to be, '" see Durarara! decently is becoming a problem .. = _ = PC and iPod except through the mystery of the format or whatever is behind it, to download episodes unavailable because of disputes fansub / forum .. and it also puts the streaming or hangs out with all the episode is completely loaded or is no longer available, " but better yet ... "Error connecting to the site" and stuff, how wonderful! -_-But not defeated, at the cost of seeing one episode a day, I see it all! * _ *
Meanwhile, even as I was about to start 10 in English says "try later" ... I take advantage of a little '!
So stock of what has happened to me so far: the dark times seem to be finally coming to an end, but when you least expect it, there is always something around the corner that is there to say "not singing victory" .. Fortunately, as long as everything can be address and resolve most of all, then it is not the case with demoralized, although I admit that at times it's easy to take and despair is just as difficult to get out. I spent a really bad time, and it is strange, usually I tend to deal with every good thing-and I admit, often tend to underestimate a little 'too-things, but I never expected to end up in the tunnel attacks Panic! O_O Having experienced this situation of inner frailty me explain what it means star really bad and do not find the courage and strength to express it, you're afraid of who you pull in is near, you feel inadequate at all out of place, as if everything you think, say and do is completely wrong and you end up with close and cry, perhaps in silence, so others do not you'll never understand and will only hurt you more than ... is totally wrong, is useless, but unfortunately, the mind is difficult to understand, or there would be no flowers flowers to probe psychiatrists to understand that you are passing in the head at that moment .. if they can. Unless it is that Edward can read minds, but .. XDDD But in any case, I am that having people next to you and understand you will encourage is the only way to help, and was indeed the case! = D Now the morale is much higher, it will be thanks to the mad adventure of Lucca, which was really refreshing and a parenthesis that has brought to light situations that I could hardly see before. However, this period should have a definite end by early December with a degree! I admit that sometimes I think about the future, with a question that sooner or later, everyone is wondering, "What do I do next?" And is quite a lottery, as everything can be found in Italy except for a job, and the idea of finding myself in a black hole is not truly excites me at all, but really, a little too niche, there will be somewhere? However, we will see a little '! Consider now the present and to my inclinations, I must say that for some 'time in this part of my creativity has informed me that they are dry! I was thinking of something interesting to say a new story, but in the end hath been resolved in a stalemate, because the conjunction of disastrous events, and the same goes for fanfiction, first of all that has gone to Twilight at all! Recently ç_ç then, after discovering the magic and sensual world of Terre d'Ange (with all its meeting of names and not just from Umineko XD), I decided to do some drawing, but in this case not even pay them ideas! But by chance I found the covers of Japanese books, and I must say I'm not bad, although some tarot cards and a bit 'off topic, which is rather odd, but okay, I doubt that an illustrator will take the trouble to go to read 900 pages of a book unless it is required! o_O But anyway, I admit that I really liked this story, though initially I had a little 'under-estimated, finding it too messy (at first reading, too many characters and too many plots), but second, it becomes much more exciting! And I must admit that there is something for everyone! \u0026lt;3 Brief Analysis by professional bias! XDD
History "Kushiel's Legacy" is divided into several legends: from I understand, three books that tell the story of Phedre, "Kushiel The dart," "The Wicker Man of Kushiel and "The incarnation of Kushiel" (meaning avatar in that sense), then there is the saga of Imriel, "The Trilogy of the legacy of betrayal," securities "Kushiel's heir," " Kushiel's justice " and "Kushiel's grace," while the last saga ... I do not even care! XD and of itself, is told a story in an AU, that others would not be that Europe at a time between the Middle Ages and the Renaissance, but whose foundations are based on a rather peculiar history. It's very Da Vinci Code, the fact that in this world, religion is based on the Blessed Elua, born from the blood of Jesus (Yeshua here) dying, tears of Magdalena and Mother Earth, but opposed by God, not the recognized as "nephew". Of course, scope and benevolent nature of love, this is carefree (Lab does a lot to read anywhere that passes flowers bloom ago XD), wanders the lands as yet unnamed, until he is captured and taken prisoner by some infidels. In his rescue down eight angels who rebel against the will of God and remain at his side, making its precepts it teaches, first of all "love to your heart" (moral freedom, eh? XD). Still being hunted down by God, these rebellious angels and Blessed Elua arriving in Terre d'Ange (aka France), that they take the name, and founded a kingdom, each according to their inclinations. The most famous Namaah remain, however, the angel of love, Kushiel, the first angel of punishment that inflicts death, and Cassiel, which is faithful to the Blessed One, but does not approve the conduct, so as to create a brotherhood, an order of warrior priests vow of chastity to protect those who have been awarded in the name of "serve and protect." Step forward, the capital city of Terre d'Ange, which over the centuries saw the angels disappear (along with reaching the true Blessed Elua Terre d'Ange, a heavenly one), is divided into thirteen houses (it is very Cavalieri Zodiac XDD), which are named after flowers, and in which the followers are raised and educated in the precepts precise and different from house to house, but all respond to the fundamental precept of Elua. And we insert here the story of Phaedra, who was born by un'adepta of Jasmine House, but a slave, and the son of a merchant prince. Since newborn, is characterized by a spot in the eye, a red speck that establishes the fate along with your name, the bearer of doom, the so-called dart Kushiel ... What will be, the next explanation, given that by dint of writing time has passed!
Mh .. I woke up from afternoon nap after dreaming of writing on lj, so I said "sooner or later" I do .. and here I am! Also because what happens? From the series "This is what has not to be, '" see Durarara! decently is becoming a problem .. = _ = PC and iPod except through the mystery of the format or whatever is behind it, to download episodes unavailable because of disputes fansub / forum .. and it also puts the streaming or hangs out with all the episode is completely loaded or is no longer available, " but better yet ... "Error connecting to the site" and stuff, how wonderful! -_-But not defeated, at the cost of seeing one episode a day, I see it all! * _ *
Meanwhile, even as I was about to start 10 in English says "try later" ... I take advantage of a little '!
So stock of what has happened to me so far: the dark times seem to be finally coming to an end, but when you least expect it, there is always something around the corner that is there to say "not singing victory" .. Fortunately, as long as everything can be address and resolve most of all, then it is not the case with demoralized, although I admit that at times it's easy to take and despair is just as difficult to get out. I spent a really bad time, and it is strange, usually I tend to deal with every good thing-and I admit, often tend to underestimate a little 'too-things, but I never expected to end up in the tunnel attacks Panic! O_O Having experienced this situation of inner frailty me explain what it means star really bad and do not find the courage and strength to express it, you're afraid of who you pull in is near, you feel inadequate at all out of place, as if everything you think, say and do is completely wrong and you end up with close and cry, perhaps in silence, so others do not you'll never understand and will only hurt you more than ... is totally wrong, is useless, but unfortunately, the mind is difficult to understand, or there would be no flowers flowers to probe psychiatrists to understand that you are passing in the head at that moment .. if they can. Unless it is that Edward can read minds, but .. XDDD But in any case, I am that having people next to you and understand you will encourage is the only way to help, and was indeed the case! = D Now the morale is much higher, it will be thanks to the mad adventure of Lucca, which was really refreshing and a parenthesis that has brought to light situations that I could hardly see before. However, this period should have a definite end by early December with a degree! I admit that sometimes I think about the future, with a question that sooner or later, everyone is wondering, "What do I do next?" And is quite a lottery, as everything can be found in Italy except for a job, and the idea of finding myself in a black hole is not truly excites me at all, but really, a little too niche, there will be somewhere? However, we will see a little '! Consider now the present and to my inclinations, I must say that for some 'time in this part of my creativity has informed me that they are dry! I was thinking of something interesting to say a new story, but in the end hath been resolved in a stalemate, because the conjunction of disastrous events, and the same goes for fanfiction, first of all that has gone to Twilight at all! Recently ç_ç then, after discovering the magic and sensual world of Terre d'Ange (with all its meeting of names and not just from Umineko XD), I decided to do some drawing, but in this case not even pay them ideas! But by chance I found the covers of Japanese books, and I must say I'm not bad, although some tarot cards and a bit 'off topic, which is rather odd, but okay, I doubt that an illustrator will take the trouble to go to read 900 pages of a book unless it is required! o_O But anyway, I admit that I really liked this story, though initially I had a little 'under-estimated, finding it too messy (at first reading, too many characters and too many plots), but second, it becomes much more exciting! And I must admit that there is something for everyone! \u0026lt;3 Brief Analysis by professional bias! XDD
History "Kushiel's Legacy" is divided into several legends: from I understand, three books that tell the story of Phedre, "Kushiel The dart," "The Wicker Man of Kushiel and "The incarnation of Kushiel" (meaning avatar in that sense), then there is the saga of Imriel, "The Trilogy of the legacy of betrayal," securities "Kushiel's heir," " Kushiel's justice " and "Kushiel's grace," while the last saga ... I do not even care! XD and of itself, is told a story in an AU, that others would not be that Europe at a time between the Middle Ages and the Renaissance, but whose foundations are based on a rather peculiar history. It's very Da Vinci Code, the fact that in this world, religion is based on the Blessed Elua, born from the blood of Jesus (Yeshua here) dying, tears of Magdalena and Mother Earth, but opposed by God, not the recognized as "nephew". Of course, scope and benevolent nature of love, this is carefree (Lab does a lot to read anywhere that passes flowers bloom ago XD), wanders the lands as yet unnamed, until he is captured and taken prisoner by some infidels. In his rescue down eight angels who rebel against the will of God and remain at his side, making its precepts it teaches, first of all "love to your heart" (moral freedom, eh? XD). Still being hunted down by God, these rebellious angels and Blessed Elua arriving in Terre d'Ange (aka France), that they take the name, and founded a kingdom, each according to their inclinations. The most famous Namaah remain, however, the angel of love, Kushiel, the first angel of punishment that inflicts death, and Cassiel, which is faithful to the Blessed One, but does not approve the conduct, so as to create a brotherhood, an order of warrior priests vow of chastity to protect those who have been awarded in the name of "serve and protect." Step forward, the capital city of Terre d'Ange, which over the centuries saw the angels disappear (along with reaching the true Blessed Elua Terre d'Ange, a heavenly one), is divided into thirteen houses (it is very Cavalieri Zodiac XDD), which are named after flowers, and in which the followers are raised and educated in the precepts precise and different from house to house, but all respond to the fundamental precept of Elua. And we insert here the story of Phaedra, who was born by un'adepta of Jasmine House, but a slave, and the son of a merchant prince. Since newborn, is characterized by a spot in the eye, a red speck that establishes the fate along with your name, the bearer of doom, the so-called dart Kushiel ... What will be, the next explanation, given that by dint of writing time has passed!
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